Working with me is like being given a drink of water in the desert
You will feel seen, held, soothed and relieved. Relieved to know that you are not alone, that parenting is hard and that your own trauma (and your nervous system and those of your kids) will likely have made the transition to being a parent much harder. I want to tell you there is so much HOPE.
Your struggles are not your fault, they can likely be traced to your own childhood and the coping strategies you learnt to survive. All of this can be improved.
As someone recovering from the impacts of growing up in a dysfunctional family myself, I knew parenting would be a challenge. I had done a lot of my own personal work and trauma therapy prior to kids and yet, despite this, I was set back to emotional ground zero by motherhood.
Many years ago (after a year in which my life quite literally fell apart) my wise therapist suggested I do a 28 day addiction treatment programme.
My passion for supporting parents who are parenting after their own childhood trauma began in that treatment centre. I looked around and realised how challenging parenting would be with the coping strategies we develop when we have not had our own needs met in childhood.
Even though I entered motherhood as a trained Psychotherapist with tons of tools, trauma and nervous system trainings and years of personal therapy under my belt my experience of motherhood blindsided me. I know you are here because you were blindsided too.
You will walk away from our work together with an embodied sense of your own good-enough-ness.
Your self compassion will grow. You will allow the expression of the huge grief you feel for what you never received and you will learn how to start giving yourself what you need now. Your ability to parent your wounded inner child and give her what she needs TODAY will give you more freedom in your adult life as you develop into your own greatest advocate and resource.
Unfortunately, we don't ever get to have our own childhoods again…..
but parenting our own children is the greatest portal to our own unhealed pain.
This huge opportunity for reparenting yourself will see you grow in love, appreciation, gratitude and acceptance for yourself. You will become more peaceful, more content and more able to acknowledge the wonderful being you already ARE, without needing to be constantly DOING more.
The personal transformation you undergo will bring more love, more contentedness, more rest and more being (as opposed to doing) into the world.
Many of us have grown up with a false premise that has us believe we are never enough. When we are traumatised and wounded within our families of origin we make very good workers in our patriarchal, capitalist society because our trauma and shame trap us. We are constantly working harder and trying to be better, do better, buy more stuff and be more shiny to counteract our deep seated beliefs which are all some version of 'I am not good enough', 'I am not worthy' or 'I don't matter'. The shame voices inside us DO NOT speak the truth and through working with me you will learn this which will free you to make choices that are nourishing and loving, instead of always making choices to try and get away from the shame you feel.
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”
— Mary Oliver
My Qualifications
Cath Counihan is an Integrative Psychotherapist working in private practise in London. I retrained in Integrative Psychotherapy and Psychodynamic Counselling at the Metanoia Institute, London after a career in Financial Services. My first career followed degrees in economics. I worked in the financial sector in London as a management consultant at Deloitte, project manager at UBS and various risk roles at other investment banks.
My own personal breakdown and healing journey led me to retrain as a psychotherapist. In addition to seeing clients, I now write and teach online courses, run in person groups and am writing a book. I have taught at the Bowlby Centre in London on the Attachment Based Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy training and for The International Attachment Network.
I am accredited by the UK Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP) and a member of the International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation.
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Transforming Touch Therapist - trained with Dr Stephen Terrell.
Somatic Experiencing Trainee.
EMDR – EMDR practitioner trained with Sandi Richman (EMDR Europe Accredited Trainer).
Transforming the Experienced Based Brain – Developmental Trauma Training with Dr Stephen Terrell.
The Female Nervous System and Jaguar (in person) - Kimberly Johnson.
Polyvagal Theory: Engaging the Rhythm of Regulation: Foundations of Polyvagal Informed Practice Part I with Deb Dana (6 months).
Interpersonal Neurobiology: Nurturing the Heart with the Brain in Mind. Training with Bonnie Badenoch (one year).
Motherhood Studies Practitioner Certification with Dr Sophie Brock.
Multiple Trauma, Shame and Nervous System trainings with the following teachers:
Babette Rothschild (in person)
Janina Fisher (in person)
Arielle Schwartz
Christiane Sanderson (in person)
Richard Erskine
Deb Dana
Peter Levine
Various in person attachment and relational trainings with Jeremy Holmes, Linda Cundy and Mick Cooper.
Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples, have completed the first externship.
Masters of Science in Integrative Psychotherapy, Metanoia Institute (validated by Middlesex University).
Integrative Diploma in Psychodynamic Counselling, Metanoia Institute.
BA Hons (Economics) (1st class), University of the Witwatersrand.
BA (Economics and Economic History), University of the Witwatersrand.
